An example of declarative language usage within an everyday task:

When you are starting to use declarative language, it is hard. You should not try to use declarative language all day because then you will feel like a failure as it is highly unlikely that you will remember to use declarative language while you are busy taking care of everyone! A more productive route, in the beginning, is to a choose specific activity, e.g. when you are getting the child ready for school. You could begin by planning ahead. You could write out the commands you typically give to the child during this activity and then write out the corresponding, possible declarative statements. While the goal is not to memorize declarative statements, the list will give you a head start. For example, if you typically make toast with the child in the morning:

• Get the plate: “ There is no plate.” “We have nothing to put the bread on.”
• Get the bread: “The bread is in the refrigerator.”
• Open the bread: “I need four slices of bread.” or “the bag is closed.”
• Put the bread on the plate: “You don’t have to hold the bread.” or “There is the plate.”
• Get the butter: “The butter is in the refrigerator.” or “You like butter on your toast.”
• Get the jelly: “The jelly is in the refrigerator.” or “You like jelly on your toast.” or “Jelly will make the toast sweet and delicious.”
• Put the bread in the toaster: “The bread is cold.” or “The bread is not crispy.” or “You like your toast to be crispy.”
• Don’t touch the toaster: “The toaster is hot.” or “The toast is toasting.”
• Spread the butter: “ You want butter on your toast.” or “There is a knife.” or “You can spread the butter with a knife.”
• Scoop the jelly: “You like jelly on your toast.” or “You need a spoon.” “You can scoop the jelly with a spoon.”
• Eat your toast: “that toast looks delicious.” or “You must be hungry.” or “The dog might jump up and eat your toast.”

After you find using declarative language easy for the targeted task, you can choose another task to add. You can follow the same procedure of writing out the directives you would have given and translating them to declarative statements. You could gradually add more and more tasks to your repertoire. Alternatively or as a next step, you could target one location for the use of declarative language. So… whenever you are in that location, you would know that you needed to use declarative language. You could even put a sign on the door to that room. It is easiest to choose a location that is not too busy and you are not in too often. For example, the bathroom would be better than the kitchen or the bedroom would be better than the playroom.

You may notice that declarative statements typically describe the situation at that moment. Remember that after describing, it is your job to give the child time to respond. The gift of time allows the child the opportunity to assume the responsibility to solve the presented problem.