Oops: Inadvertently supporting cognitive inflexibility

Cognitive flexibility is the ability to accept change. Across a given day, we all accept small changes that occur spontaneously within the flow of every day experiences. We wear long pants instead of shorts if the day is cool. We eat a bagel instead of toast when there is no sliced bread. We arrive at work five minutes earlier because there was less traffic. We feed the dog before the cat because the dog was yapping. These small changes often do not even register as changes. These small changes are just within the flow of the day. However, for our Autistic children, each of these “small” changes might feel monumental and form the basis for an all out tantrum. Our Autistic children are often so married to their routines and their reactions to changes in the routines are so overblown that we become well trained to support the sameness within their routines. We go out of the way to keep things the same so that we don’t have to experience the monumental reactions. In essence then, we, along with our children, are reinforced by sameness. Our children are reinforced because they feel competent within the routine and a change in the routine floods the child with a loss of competence. The tantrum then ensues as a means of regaining control, and hence a sense of competence. As the adult, we just need to keep to the time schedule and a morning without a tantrum, is a morning that is successful and on schedule so we maintain the rigid routines for the child. However, given that change is inevitable within every day activities of life, we are not helping the child when we adhere to their strict routines. The key to a life that flows is one in which change is accepted with minimal notice or fuss.